Dumped

I can't write much, on my lunch break at work.

But basically, the guy I was seeing, that I had come to love, that I thought I would spend my life with just dumped me out of the blue.

Just cut me out of his life with surgical precision. Seems as though everything was just a lie.

I am so crushed. I have never had my heart broken so badly by any man.

But FUCK him!! He is not and will never be good enough for me.

He cares only about himself.

I find myself missing Lula's father so much now.

I am about to turn 30 and coming up on the one year anniversary of Lula's death, and here I sit more empty and broken hearted than ever.

I feel like I will never find the right guy. And even if I did, I'm not sure I could ever trust anyone again. This guy had me completely fooled. He was sweet and thoughtful, treated me well, told me he loved me, right up until the bitter end. Then he just said, "this isn't going to work out". Said I am too sad and I stress him out too much.

So, yeah...

I guess I'll be back to blogging a bunch again.

Please pray for me. I would never kill myself, but lately I find it hard to see the point in living if it's just constant pain like this.

How could I have been so wrong about this guy???